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Carol Vorderman talks mother's death and depression: 'I didn’t want to wake up'

The former Countdown presenter tragically lost her mum Jean to cancer in June

Hanna Fillingham

Carol Vorderman has opened up about coming to terms with her mum Jean's tragic death last year. The former Countdown presenter was left devastated after her mum was told she had terminal cancer aged 88. In an interview with Mail on Sunday's Event magazine, Carol, who is mum to daughter Katie, 26, and son Cameron, 21, said that her mum had told her in May that she hadn’t been feeling very well. "Three days later, she was in a lot of pain, so I rushed her to the Bristol Royal Infirmary. She had tests on the Sunday and on the Monday she was told she had terminal cancer," she said.

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Carol Vorderman tragically lost her mum Jean last June

"They said, 'It’s everywhere. What do you want to do?'" Carol recalled. Jean – who had already battled cancer three times – decided that she didn’t want to have chemotherapy. "Bearing in mind she was almost 89, Mum said, 'I don’t want to go through that, just keep me out of pain,'" she added. The former Loose Women panellist also said that the grieving process started before her mum had passed away, because she knew that she was terminally ill: "It's not a shock as it would be with someone who had an accident or something."

RELATED: Carol Vorderman reveals late mum left her a letter to read after her death 

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The former Countdown presenter felt suicidal during the menopause

Carol also reflected on her battle with depression after going through the menopause last summer. The depression was so severe that the mother-of-two felt suicidal. "I wouldn’t have done anything because I have kids and I am a single parent, but I definitely had a lot of thoughts that were in that bracket. I didn’t want to wake up. I wanted this blackness to stop and I couldn’t think of any way of making it stop other than just stopping," she said.

Thankfully, Carol got help from a menopausal depression expert, Professor John Studd, who told her that her feelings were down to her hormones. Carol now takes bioidentical hormones which are made from yams each morning. "the treatment work within two days and I have been right as rain ever since," she said.

RELATED: Liz Earle reveals the best foods to eat and avoid during menopause 

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